So, you did something that you truly regret and it wasn’t with the person you love. This can happen to men and women for a variety of reasons and it doesn’t have to be the kiss of death for your relationship.
Make Sure it’s Over
If you want to restore your relationship, you first have to make certain that the affair is completely over. The only way your ex is going to feel comfortable with restarting the relationship and opening their heart to you again is if they know without a doubt that you no longer have this other person in your life. If they can’t trust you again the relationship has no hope for the future.
This means you have to get as far away from the third party as possible. If this means moving to a new department at work or getting a completely new job it may be what you have to do in order to give your ex that sense of security they need to trust you again.
Get in Touch with Your Sensitive Side
You cannot expect your ex to get over the affair overnight. In most cases it can take months for them to completely let go of the pain and confusion that they feel over your affair. If you come off as insensitive or uncaring toward their emotions they will distance themselves further from you, rather than warming up to the idea of a relationship with you.
Your relationship could actually come out stronger in the end if you allow them to release their emotions and frustrations and move beyond them. This means allowing them to cry on your shoulder, answering their questions honestly, and giving them all of the support and encouragement they need to move beyond the pain.
In some cases, you may have to pay for your crimes by allowing them to scream at you, throw things at you, and just vent their rage toward you. Getting this out may help them feel better, but you cannot respond with anger or insensitive comments. Take it all and then be there when they break down with tears of pain.
Genuinely Offer Solutions
As your ex becomes less angry with you and starts to build up some trust toward you again, you will have to approach the problems in the relationship that opened the door to the affair. This means you need to start doing some introspection right now so you clearly understand a few things:
* Why did you cheat with someone else when you loved your partner so much?
* What changes in the relationship would have stopped you from going through with the affair?
If you can pinpoint what you were missing in the relationship and mutually work to build up that aspect of the relationship, you can create a strong bond that is near indestructible in the future.
Ask About Their Needs
Now that you have seriously considered what needs were lacking for you in the relationship, determine what needs your ex has that may have been lacking as well. You both need to feel fulfilled and supported if the relationship is going to work in the long term, so don’t try to make this all about you.
In the end, you can get your girl back after cheating if you are sensitive, honest, and devoted to making it work this time around.
To give yourself the best chance of winning them back quickly, click here first to follow a proven path towards getting back for good.